D Keala Naluai
30 Jun 1951 - 18 Apr 2012
Today I received news I was not ready for. My mom passed peacefully at home, in her sleep. Before she went to sleep for the last time, she was reading about her favorite thing, the Gospel of Jesus Christ, specifically an article in “Daughters of Zion” titled “Charity Never Faileth”. Charity was a subject that came up a lot over the years, especially the need for us to help other people. Looking back, that may have been the foundation that led me into the careers I am in, the military and the fire department.
My mom loved the Gospel and tried hard to instill its values in us, her children. One of her favorite scriptures was, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Although we didn’t always see eye to eye, especially when I became an adult, the Gospel was one thing we agreed upon. I learned the importance of faith, prayer, quite supplication to the Lord, the power of tithing, the need to serve our fellow man, 'Remember who you are, and what you represent and act accordingly,' 'Wisdom begins with the proper naming of things,' and so many other lessons she learned from her family growing up.
She always reminded us how ‘cleanliness was next to godliness’. Of course when I was young, that meant chores, and I didn’t like that. However, to this day, I have an innate desire to keep things orderly, though I don’t always succeed. I guess that’s where my “OCD” started.
Tonight, I was pleasantly surprised to walk into her home and see various things that meant a lot to her carefully and lovingly put in places of honor. Her glasses were carefully placed on her computer. The ukulele I first learned to play on resting on the nightstand. Her dissertation for her doctorate was neatly organized on her table and her 'Windward Homeless Coalition' binder was staged at the door. Even my 1984 Cub Scout Day Camp patch with all the pins of all the ranks I earned up to Eagle was in a bowl, with her pearls, on her bureau. Her home was peaceful, clean and orderly, just like she liked it.
Tonight, I was pleasantly surprised to walk into her home and see various things that meant a lot to her carefully and lovingly put in places of honor. Her glasses were carefully placed on her computer. The ukulele I first learned to play on resting on the nightstand. Her dissertation for her doctorate was neatly organized on her table and her 'Windward Homeless Coalition' binder was staged at the door. Even my 1984 Cub Scout Day Camp patch with all the pins of all the ranks I earned up to Eagle was in a bowl, with her pearls, on her bureau. Her home was peaceful, clean and orderly, just like she liked it.
I do know she had a tough life, full of pain and heartbreak. Some of it was her own making, some of it was not. But despite it all, she kept the faith that she tried to instill in us. And for that example, I am grateful.
Tonight, I have regrets. I regret I couldn’t spend more time with her, I regret I couldn’t help her more, I regret I didn’t listen to the Spirit a week ago and check on her and tell her I love her.
I told my sisters as we conference called with each other today, don’t worry about the “What ifs” – what if I called, what if I stayed, what if I emailed, what if…whatever it is… I told them she has no regrets now. She is at peace. She is happy. It’s a peace and happiness that can only be matched in the Temple and by the Spirit. I told them if we focus on our regrets, we will drive ourselves insane, and fail in our roles as parents, spouses, workers and friends. I told them that this is the time that our own faith in the Gospel is truly tested…do we really believe what we say we do?
I told my sisters as we conference called with each other today, don’t worry about the “What ifs” – what if I called, what if I stayed, what if I emailed, what if…whatever it is… I told them she has no regrets now. She is at peace. She is happy. It’s a peace and happiness that can only be matched in the Temple and by the Spirit. I told them if we focus on our regrets, we will drive ourselves insane, and fail in our roles as parents, spouses, workers and friends. I told them that this is the time that our own faith in the Gospel is truly tested…do we really believe what we say we do?
I am grateful for the lessons my mother has taught me over the years. I am grateful that she has finally found peace and rest in the Lord. I am grateful to have had her for a mom. Her final lesson for me- make the most of each day, because you never know if it’s your last. Live so you have No Regrets…
Thank you mom, for all you’ve done. Yes, Charity never faileth, and hopefully neither will we. We are glad you're happy and finally at peace. We love you, mom ... always have... always will... Aloha pumehana, poina‘ole. We'll see you when we get there…
